Week 2
1/13/14
Reading these first chapters, I found that even though I haven't experienced what Anzaldúa has, I could still relate to her writing. She mentioned that she hates self-imposed borders and I would agree that they can be quite troublesome. Having attended an all-girls, Catholic high school, I also related to her point about women receiving mixed signals on how they should behave. For example, we were always taught to be independent women who think for themselves and can argue for their beliefs. At the same time, there were topics (i.e. abortion, gay marriage) on which opinions were predetermined and given to us without real room for discussion. We were also taught that all women should respect themselves and that the way in which they dress is not an excuse for judgment or violent behavior. At the same time, we were constantly told to sit and dress like ladies so as to be sensitive to the male teachers on campus. I agreed with the administration, but their tone seemed to go against their message that the way a woman dresses is no excuse for violent behavior towards her. The whole experience was just a bit contradictory.
1/15/14
Our talk in class about the use of "of + weighty word" to create elegance in writing reminded me of something I learned in poetry writing last quarter. We learned that if you break a line right after a preposition such as "of" the reader will then speed up the pace of their reading to finish the line. I thought this was similar to how the use of "of + weighty word" causes the pace to pick up and emphasize the final word in the sentence.
1/17/14
I really enjoyed grounding today. When we were asked to think about how we were feeling, my first thought was "excited." Then the word "elated" drifted into my consciousness and I realized that it was perfect. I was certainly feeling full of dynamic energy. Then when we were asked to imagine being in a park, a particular memory came to mind. It involved a very pleasant day in a park with a good friend of mine who passed away this time a couple of years ago. It was interesting, because I felt both sad and happy (nostalgic, one could say). In a way, it brought me down from the ecstatic high I was experiencing but not in a bad way. I felt far more grounded and stable afterwards, and I think that's a good thing.
Synthesis 2
It’s taken me a bit to figure out how these three learning notes could somehow relate, but I think I’ve found the connection through re-interpretation. When you use the writing construct of “of + weighty word,” it causes you to speed up your reading to the end, the climax, of the sentence. When I came to class on Friday, I was feeling elated and full of energy. I felt like I was having a great day, but also excited to see where the day would lead. Like with the “of + weighty word” construction, I think I was rushing a bit through the day in my excitement (at some points I was literally skipping). This isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but I wasn’t really living in the moment in the way that I probably should have been. I found that grounding allowed me to come down from my high, letting me slow down so that I could enjoy the nuances of the moment rather than rushing off in excitement to the future.
Continuing with Friday’s grounding, I experienced seemingly conflicting emotions: happiness at the sweet memory of my friend and I, but sadness at her passing. Although it’s not negative in the same sense, I think this relates to the mixed signals Anzaldúa writes about receiving. It can be hard to reconcile seemingly conflicting emotions and signals, but I think grounding helped me to do this. Usually when I think about my friend, I tend to the sad side of things. However, this time I was able to miss her, remember our time together, and still stay detached in a way. Neither happy nor sad, but pleasantly calm and in-between the two.
2. Roxanne Rashedi
Dear Emma,
Thank you for sharing your insights, and your experiences in grounding. I'm sad to hear about your friend's passing but grateful to hear that grounding gave you the opportunity to reflect on your friendship and not necessarily be happy or sad. It seems like grounding gave you the space to feel what you felt but it also allowed you to not get caught up in the emotion. Is that right? That is, to miss him/her and feel sadness or a bittersweet sadness but with compassion?
I don't know if you have a research topic in-mind, but have you thought about research topics on mindfulness and education? It's just a thought. We can chat more in office hours too.
Happy weekend,
Professor Rashedi
01/19/14, 05:37 am
1. Roxanne Rashedi
Emma, this is very interesting. Can you tease out your last line in this note? In what ways did you and/or your peers receive mixed signals?
01/14/14, 07:37 pm